The Art of Fight | A Brief History of Skiers and Snowboarders Having Violent Altercations
Death, taxes, and skiers having fights with snowboarders in the mountains are life’s only inevitabilities
If there’s one thing that the long and bloody history of skiers fighting snowboarders has shown us, it’s that we human beings are inherently programmed to destroy ourselves. There’s just too many differing ideologies out there, too many opinionated people with contrasting belief systems, for us to ever share the same ball of space rock without eventually going to war over something.
We like to think we’ve evolved, become more civilised, but deep down we’re still cavemen looking to protect what’s ours by any means necessary – even if it results in severe verbal disputes and weird, almost ballet-like, on-snow wrestling.
Snowboarders mouthing off at skiers. Skiers mouthing off at snowboarders. It’s a tale as old as time. All we can do is flick through the pages of history, tell ourselves we’ve all learned something while preaching “peace, love, and understanding”, and inevitably fall back into our old ways before teatime.
Skier Dad vs. Snowboarder Bro & Homies
Did… did RIDE pay for this? Because… look… it sort… it sort of looks like product placement. The way the board’s logo is just so on show. This is what the internet has done to our minds. Nothing is real anymore. Nothing is fake. Everything is surely, in some way or other, branded content made in partnership with someone somewhere.
Angry skier dad tries to fight snowboarders
This is a video that nobody comes out of particularly well. The ‘angry skier dad’ in the video’s title is cringe in that specific way that only ‘your dad when he’s in a ski resort’ can be. The less said about the snowboarder in the Johnny Borrell style white trousers, who decides to get topless like the bare-knuckle boxers of yore, the better. Embarrassing for everyone involved quite frankly.
Angry skier dad goes into RAGE mode
Not going to dwell on the content of this video too much. Instead, let’s talk about the genuinely world-class Microsoft Paint job on the fire breathing mouth. Hang this video’s thumbnail in the Louvre. It’s incredible; a John Martin hellscape for the YouTube generation.
Skiers vs Snowboarder
“You guys are a bunch of f*cking snowboarders.”
“Get the f*ck out of here, dude.”
The bucket hat.
We hate everything about this video, and everyone in it. We particularly hate the bucket hat. There’s a time and a place for such an item of headwear, and the ski slopes… sorry… no… not the place for it.
Ski student gets “wiped out”, instructor goes nuts!
This one builds like a slow-burn HBO drama. You’re watching and waiting, watching and waiting, all the time knowing that when the pay off comes it’s going to be a big one. And crikey, when the beat drops here does it drop. It’s skier on skier action, less of a fight and more of two-footed, straight red card, tackle, but it’s spectacular. Proof that people will eventually turn on everyone, including people on their “side”. Some will say the guy sliding in didn’t mean it, we say… straight up attempted murder.
Crazy snowboarder attacks skier, gets handled
Are there any words in the English language more exciting than ‘This video is age-restricted and only available on YouTube’? We’d argue that there most definitely is not.
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